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Youth gone stagnant water

Sunday on June 7th, 2020Other

Before I rarely describe their living conditions is a pool of stagnant water, then, at least I still fantasy of the capital, I look forward to their future, fantasize about a happy life, in fact, that requirement is not a luxury, I just want to have a stable job, I do not care much or how little, can live in their own house, and I love to meet the people I love, however, there is no one to achieve.

The saddest thing is that people always feel that they are different, including their own ideas, but the fact that you live in front of you in the face of reality, you are nothing, you could not be more ordinary, no one cares what you think , you're nook and cranny inside an ant, no one cares about your presence, and no one cares you walk posture, this is your life Cock wire, sometimes, one is born, it was decided a lot of things, the equivalent of some children, sitting 200 square house, blowing air conditioning, playing ipad, and some children, but only in bare feet Ah, under the scorching sun, playing in the dirt in the streets, picking up branches.

Nothing in this world of equality, so-called equality is a lie, because you do not want equality among human nature is, people like to compare like to find their own sense of superiority from the comparison, not innate sense of superiority, but more out.

Every day I braved the midday sun, walking in a straight road, next to a large area, the sun can not be called beautiful, because I was not in the mood to enjoy, I just feel like I was burning himself in it is dry, so I can only accelerate our pace, my head must be low, because my boundless sky.

When I saw one young woman next to me, driving SUV, from the time my side zips, I once again ask yourself, when you can have a car of his own, even if it is an Alto, in fact, I slowly discovered that, as a man, a woman in front of me is very confident, because they have too many good so I can not control, I can quite exhaust gas with the smell in the car, unable to sit inside and enjoy the comfort I know that to my present state, even if I have ten times the effort, can not be driving a car, and they go hand in hand.

Every day doing repetitive work, I can work without having to clean aunt and security, and the whole responsibility of a person I am, I try to comfort myself, this is the workout for me, this way, I went to suffer, I must cry a laugh. Although I live in the eyes of others, even though I ignore others despise my eyes, although when I called when someone pointed, I smile to the face, although I bent down to pick up other people tear up pieces of paper, even though I have copied every day the morning will record other people, although I repeat every day, Mr., Miss call, even though I use daily paper folded numerous aircraft ...... this is all my work.

I'm looking for someone to talk, trying to be my job to understand the bitterness and loneliness, but I rarely get sympathy, I know there are a lot of feelings to themselves to experience, to enjoy themselves, although very bitter, also to swallow their own. Easy to share the joy with others, but it is difficult to share with others the pain, because the pain is often more complicated than happy, more enjoyably than happy pain, pain deeper than happy.

When I took the mop every day, step by step, dragging the time, in that moment I think about life, I think in my fucking life, I try to drag seriously, do not care about the eyes next, perhaps, the moment I refined, and perhaps that moment I really sinking, and no longer stand up, I know that after being defeated life, is very difficult to stand up, and a person is actually a shell, only full of ideals and fighting spirit, have liberty and happiness this man is truly alive, at the moment I do not know what state I was, I just want to hurry over time, let me have that moment of self-esteem.

"Beijing Youth" Ho Tung, when he resigned civil servants, he rode his bike electric car, Pidianpidian ran on the road, his face a smile, standing on the bridge, shouting aloud, ah that moment, I knew he was really happy, he was freed, he was free, he finally lived up to his own.

I understand the practice of Ho Tung, indeed, many of us are really so big for the parents live, the parents want us to go to college, so we are working like mad to go to college, parents want us to work, so we obsequious , compromises to adapt to society, parents want us to get married, so we went blind, then married, then that is life, everything is hope parents happy, so that parents face, most of the people are taking this process, but some people walk better, some people go relatively rough, this is our life, several years later, when I look back, only to find that we could not remember what it was like youth, and it seems we are from not walk.

A long time, so I have after a long day, and recently I have been asked what I like Zuosa? My initial vision is what? I have done a crazy thing? Full answer is no, I forgot my ideals, I forgot my quest, I lost direction in life, I became seeding, I fall, everything becomes blurred, becomes overwhelmed, where is the front? Go left or go right, I can not weigh, how I wish in front of a lamp, even if the lighting is very dark, I think I will strive to run up, gripping final youth.

And a body without a soul on the road, I can only wander in this city I do not have a sense of belonging, wearing a pair of shell, trudged, with a pair of blurred eyes, my glance go around and write down this incomprehensible text!

As a backwater of youth, and slowly fade away, and I, still in place, to tell the initial share of good ......

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